My Mia Girl

After my mom's post, I received this email from my dear friend Mia. I read it, cried a lot (and continue to do so after every reading), and asked her if I could share it to put it in the blog archive. She agreed after some prodding. Mia, I love you to pieces. I am so blessed that I stumbled upon you. My life is all the richer.

Since the moment I met Kate (or Veesta as I like to call her) I knew she was someone special. For someone to put up with me, she had to be! In Mississippi, Kelly and I were just drawn to her for some reason and the three of us made a great team. Beyond a passion and a love for Habitat for Humanity and AmeriCorps and an accidental meeting due to being in the same place at the same time, we were (and remain to be) three very different girls. Coming from Connecticut, Kelly was the sweet and innocent conscience on your shoulder with an open heart and a good head on her shoulders. Coming from Massachusetts, I think I came with a sarcastic attitude and a little bit of typical Masshole aggression, mixed with an I know it all attitude and a 'let's walk on the edge' personality. Kate, from New York City, was the epitome of New York with her dramatic escapades, her 'jump right off the edge and into the ocean, head first, wearing nothing but a bra and underwear' personality, and her constant optimism. Regardless, the three of us made sense and we traveled across South Carolina (and later the Northeast) in order to visit as often as we could. Weekends together were filled with booze, movies, love, cheese fries, church (yes, church!) and pure fun. I remember this teaching fellowship that she was so excited about last year some time around June or so. She called me for all sorts of words of wisdom on teaching and I couldn’t help but let my passion overflow as I shared my thoughts with Kate. Later, when I asked about it, she told me it was “turning out to be pretty sketchy.” So she dropped the program and got a good 9-5 decent job. This didn’t seem like enough of a challenge for Kate but she did it and I respected her decision for whatever reasons.


I remember Kate driving out to see me last summer. I waited until almost midnight for her arrival on a Friday night and she came up my stairs and onto my couch and said “I’m pregnant” and I thought she must be joking. Turns out, she wasn’t, and it really ruined my booze-filled weekend but it made my Kate-filled weekend that much better. We talked a lot about everything: Terry, abortion, baby names, baby schemes, guys, plans, thoughts, ideas, feelings, emotions, love, hate… and I remember thinking, God I hope Kate can do it. It isn't that I doubted her. After all, I think Kate might quite honestly be one of the strongest and most beautiful people that I’ve ever met, but having a baby – well – let’s just say – it’s not a predicament I’d want to be in.


Kate is not the first pregnant person I’ve ever known but I don’t know that I’ve ever met one so dedicated. I couldn’t believe how she gave up so many things in order to raise Bean like the teaching fellowship and coffee. I don’t even think she had caffeine during her pregnancy! How selfless! I went out to see her in January and I couldn’t believe how huge she was and how dedicated she was and how unbelievably happy she was. I’ve always thought of Kate as the type to make the best out of every situation but I didn’t expect her to be quite so wonderful and beautiful and open to all that was going on with her body, her brain, her heart, and her soul. Kate has this intensity about her, in everything she does. She’s caring and thoughtful and the kind of person that anyone is lucky to have as a friend… but as for Bean… I can’t believe how lucky he is to have her for a mother. Many mothers, especially young ones with unplanned pregnancies, have regrets but Kate isn’t one of them. She has not only taken on the role of motherhood but she has embraced it with open arms and I think she’s doing an amazing job. I think Bean (or Wyatt if I must call him by his given name!) is quite possibly one of the luckiest people on earth. I hope eighteen years from now or twenty years from now or fifty years from now, Bean reads things like this and realizes how strong and beautiful and optimistic and truly brilliant his mother was, is and always will be. I don’t know Terry but if Terry is anything like the way that Kate has described him to me, Bean is a very, very lucky boy. As for my dear, sweet Bean: if you have one-half of the character your mother has, one-eighth of the strength your father has, one-fourth of the love your mother has, one-twelfth of the drive of both of your parents, one-fifteenth of the spirit, one-thirtieth of the dedication, the love, the unbelievable devotion; you will be more than blessed. I love you both.