And then This Happened

Welcome to the newest member of 105.  Fresh from North Shore Animal League, a charming little beast of a dog named Cash.  As in: Johnny Cash.  As in: finally a dog with a real name. 

Likes are: ripping up anything within a 10 mile radius, taking large dumps, and dragging Pup around by his tail.

Dislikes: taking his food away in fear that his stomach might explode (he is RAVENOUS), being locked in his crate, and being scolding for peeing on the carpet for the 12th time.

I am sure you will make life more eventful!

The Great Destructor

I haven't mentioned our four legged family member in a while and I am sure you are dying for an update.  He is settling in quite nicely although we are noticing a lot of neurotic tendencies.  This dog is OUT OF HIS MIND.  I have my theories about why he is such a neurotic dog.  Maybe he was separated too early from his mother.  Maybe the puppy place didn't treat him so well.  Maybe he ate some poisoned dog food. Maybe he just lost too many brain cells.  I'm not sure but whatever the reason, something is not all there. Here's the proof:

1. He will eat anything.  I when I say anything, I mean everything.  Steak, mac and cheese, lasagna, and then not so normal stuff like carrots, cardboard, stale bread thrown in the backyard for the birds, blankets, underwear, sticks and Wyatt's toys.  I actually took a video of Pup jumping on the arm of a chair to take a carrot out of a bowl.  I got a box of chocolates for Dad's birthday and left them on the kitchen table.  We passed each other on the road, less then 1 minute way from the house.  Pup ate the entire box then puked for the rest of the night.

2. Along with the eating comes the begging.  He is  CONSTANTLY begging.  Inching closer and closer to the food source until he is literally on top of you watching you eat like a tennis match.  He chases Wyatt around the house jumping after whatever Wyatt is holding in his hand.  He attacks Wyatt when he gets down from the table, licking his pants, hands, shirt, and wherever else food has landed.  Mom decided that he just needed to be fed more and he is not only still begging but now he's fat.

3. Thats all fairly normal I guess but in addition to his food fetishes, he needs to be very close to you all the time.  Like living on Mom's lap and when sleeping on the bed he inches closer and closer until he is on a pillow breathing into your face.  When I am playing on the floor with Wyatt, he has to sit on the legos or puzzle pieces.  When he's sleeping on the couch while I am watching TV and he will get up to come to the bathroom with me.  He waits outside the bathroom door while mom or I are showering.  I can't quite do this justice because it is really something you have to see to believe.

4.  He is abysmal at walking on his leash.  Just the sight of Wyatt putting on his shoes or jacket sends the dog into hysterics.  He runs and barks and barks and barks.  Oh God the barking.  And after the barking its the running around everything he can find; tangling his leash and himself around trees, lamp posts, or parking signs.  Its a nightmare.  You would think he would get better the more walks he went on (we tried this theory; a walk everyday and running around with the neighborhood kids in the afternoon) but no, he got worse.  And he pulls, like ripping your arm out of its socket pulls.  The worst is when he runs around Wyatt and tangles his legs.  They don't make a leash short enough for this dog.  If they did, I would buy it.

Wy and Pup in my laundry.

5. He has an insatiable need to lay in the clean, hot laundry.  Need I say more.

6. He has a sick fascination with our cat, Delilah.  He chases the poor thing all over the house.  But she has learned, the coy little cat.  She taunts him.  She will sit perfectly still as he charges for her.  Then he chickens out and stops, as he is usually met with her sharp claws, absolutely dumbfounded on why she isn't moving.  Then she usually starts rubbing all over him while purring.  It drives him crazy and sets him barking and running in circles sliding on the kitchen floor.  Their love/hate relationship is hysterical to watch.  Delilah likes to hang out on the porch roof.  One early morning, while Delilah was casually sunning herself, Pup caught a glimpse and decided to jump through the slightly open window.  6 in the morning Pup and Delilah running circles on our roof, Mom yelling for Pup to come inside, for all the casual dog walkers to see. I would have paid good money to see that.

Pup Garbage Destruction

7. I bought this dress for my 10 year reunion.  I LOVE this dress.  I gingerly took it out of the box and spread it out on the floor to admire it.  Pup ran over, sat on it, then started to drag his butt on it.  Really!?! Do I have to say more?

Most of the time its endearing.  I guess you could say he fits right in with the family.  Bear was a neurotic dog as well but she was also a REALLY good dog.  Pup (I am praying) is still in his mischievous puppy years and will eventually grow into a really good neurotic dog.  When I was in college I bought a fighting fish that looked like he was the loser in about 1400 fights.  No one could understand why I would buy a fighting fish that had all its fins bitten off.  But I did.  Just because I didn't think anyone else would.  Maybe I saw some of that in Pup too.  That we needed to save him.  And besides aren't we all just a little neurotic.  When he's not eating the garbage or my underwear he really is very sweet.

Now Selling On Ebay:

This Saturday post has a story to go along with it.  On Wednesday night (or Thursday morning) I woke up at 5am.  Soaking.  Wet.  My first thought is My God I peed myself.  Upon further investigation the saturated spot seemed to be down by my knees on the opposite side of Wyatt.  Pup's usual sleeping spot.  I investigated some more and found that my bed was soaking wet from the top comforter all the way to the mattress, through the comforter, two sheets and a mattress pad.  The smell test concluded bacon bits.  And Pup's paws were wet and he's giving me this real sheepish look.  The stupid dog Wet MY BED!!  Have you ever heard of a dog that pee's where he sleeps?!?  I jump up, grab his collar, and drag him outside.  Then go back to the bedroom to figure out what I am going to do.  As my luck would have it, the Pup festivities woke Wyatt up, just enough, for him to have to go potty but not enough that he asked me or even so much as lifted his beautiful head off the pillow.  So that leaves me covered in Pup pee, Wyatt covered in Wyatt pee, and the bed sopping from both crime scenes.  I decide that this is just too much and put a sleeping Wyatt on a pillow while I change the sheets around him, in the dark.  He opens his eyes for a millisecond when I changed his PJ's to ask "What happened, Momma?" Oh sweetie, you don't even want to know.

Conclusion:  I am selling Pup on Ebay.  Hell, I will pay for someone to take this dog.  Mom thought this was very funny.  Hilarious!!  I guess this is what I get for opening my bed to a 2 year old and a puppy.

Who's the Human?

A Boy, His Dog, and a Truck

The 3 P's of My Life: Puke, Poop, and Pee

Wyatt is sick. I know its that time of year when everyone feels yucky but he is so helpless when he feels bad. He can't tell me what is bothering him so he just sits and looks pathetic. It makes it so much worse. He has this hacking cough that made him sound like a barking seal in the beginning and now sounds more like the heat coming on in the old pipes. When I do get him to sleep, he will wake himself up in coughing fits where he can't breathe. Last night it got so bad he started throwing up. He totally didn't care. It was like "Hack, hack, puke, hack, puke, hack, hack. Oh, Mom turned the light on. Time to get my trucks!" At one point, while I was changing the sheets, he threw a "Morning!!" in the mix. "No, bud, its still time for sleeping." Its already been a week and two doctor visits. I really hope it doesn't last much longer.

I want everyone who said no to us getting a dog to keep their "I told you so's" to themselves for a minute while I vent about Pup. Pup is very cute, cuddly and lovable but he is also very stupid. Seriously, there has to be some genetic flaw or lack of brain cells or something. He EATS everything. EVERYTHING!! If you need an example: all of Wyatt's toys, books, the draft dodger, pens, my underwear (which is too disgusting to go into detail), bananas, paper, glasses, my cell phone charger and Mac charger, etc, etc. I am praying that it is just the puppy phase because if he keeps on I am going to give him away on the corner. I am tailoring Wyatt's Christmas list around what I think will last the longest without Pup eating it. I found this amazing functioning cement mixer that Wyatt would DIE for and I am hesitating because spending $40 on a dog toy is out of my budget. Also, he is still having potty issues. Specifically, when I am giving Wyatt a bath. I think it might be vindictive because Pup will get in the bath if I let him in the bathroom. But my common sense tells me he is not smart enough to be vindictive. I yell "Pup" four thousand times a day. Bear was just such an amazing dog. Even in heaven she is still making Pup look bad. My only consolation is that Wyatt adores him. Seeing Wyatt on the couch with Pup's head on his lap is worth it while I am scrubbing the carpet. Most of the time. Ok, I'm ready for the "I told you so's" now.

Wyatt said "Stop cars, train coming" about two weeks ago. I was reading him a book and we were on a page about a railroad crossing. Hands down, he is a genius. I am considering this a sentence. Sentences before two years old!! Is this genius status or am I just being a proud mom who thinks their child is the best and possibly the next Einstein? His sense of language in general seems very advanced to me. He knows possessives. Like Mom's shoes and Pa's shirt. He has a sense of humor. He does this fake laugh, covers his mouth and says "silly, silly." He tells whole stories around the dinner table about what he did at Mommy and Me class or what he saw outside that day. Now, if I can just get him to pee on the potty. We sat in the bathroom yesterday for 10 minutes for him to walk into the den and pee on the rug.

Nameless

Dear Readers, I have an extremely good reason for going M.I.A for the past two weeks. I am hoping that once I explain it to you, you will forgive me. Once I have gained your forgiveness, I am hoping that you will help me on what has been the most difficult task that has ever been set before me. Readers, I need your help. It is only you that can aid me in a task that is proving to be most impossible.

First, my excuse. I bought a puppy. Yes, you read that right. I bought a puppy!! I have been trying to talk my parents into letting me buy a puppy for Wyatt (and myself) for ages and all my talking has finally paid off. This little one is the cutest thing, with love me eyes, and a mellow temper. He's 12 weeks and we think a King Charles Spaniel and a Bichon, although we might find out differently at his first vets appointment. Wyatt, at first, was sceptical but is growing to love him. Wyatt likes to find old unused toys to put in the puppy crate. But GOD FORBID that dog LOOK at his cars the wrong way. He is having slight jealousy issues. Every time I go to play with the pup, Wyatt immediately has something else to show me. Grabbing my hand and pulling me into the other direction. I think it is going to be really good for him to have a companion of sorts. Potty training is going well. He has had less accidents then Wyatt. So, I think I get a gold star for that in the parent book (or the dog does at least). Overall, he has been a joy of a new addition.

Second, your help. Between Mom, Dad, Becca, Lizzy, and I, we CANNOT seem to agree on a name. Puppy, Puppy dog and Pup will only last us much longer. I am going to post some of our favorite names along the right sidebar. Please vote. Send it to your friends. Have them vote. Vote often. Vote as many times as you want. Similar to when I was naming Wyatt I need help. I am going to leave it up for 2 weeks. I know he's my dog and I can name him whatever I want but since we live at home I want a name we can all agree on. I think I just need some perspective if some of these names are completely awful. Please feel free to add any names that you think we might like in the comments. I am looking for something manly, possibly with a nick name. Human names and made up or unconviential names are all fair game. I was thinking something Irish, or Southern, or famous poet, author, movie star, etc. Something that rings well with Wyatt. I am most grateful for all your help.