I moved into my cousin Michael's house. With our house under construction, only two livable bedrooms, a plethora of baby supplies, and a thick layer of dust we decided that it was for the best if I slept elsewhere for a while. Michael has an extra bedroom and I was more than willing to allow myself some privacy for a short time.
It snowed, rained, froze, and hailed last night. I was glad that I didn't have to drive far. Pregnant ladies and ice don't really mix. I stopped at the store on my way to Mikes and got brownies and dinner. If I had it my way they would have been eaten in that order. He has this great cottage that overlooks the church. It reminds me of the English countryside that I loved to watch roll by on the bus when I lived there. His cottage even reminds me of my house in Leeds, except cleaner, warmer, and much more inviting. There are little nooks and crannies, closets misshapen in any spare space, hardwood floors, and deep recessed windows to accommodate the think stone walls.
I made our brownies (caramel, walnut brownies) while Michael cooked our dinner of ravioli and garlic bread. I swear I wanted to shove my entire face in that bowl of brownie mix and lap it up. The urge was so strong to lick the bowl, to use my finger as a spatula and get every last inch of batter. Forget baking, lets just eat it raw. I held back because of the raw egg, salmonella, and Mr. Bean. Another thing that will get me though labor. I started making a mental list of things I am unable to eat or drink so that I can binge when he's finally here. There will be feta cheese, wine, caffeinated mocha lattes, brownie batter, and a baby boy in my future. That's motivation for me.
Using all my will power, I waited until the brownies were cooked and had about 5, with a glass of milk to make them nutritious. We sat by the crackling fire and watched a movie while the ice and snow accumulated outside. It was picture perfect. I never thought that I would ever be so happy. Right now, in this moment, despite all the anxiety and upheaval, I am content in my life and the direction it is taking. I find myself smiling at nothing while driving down the road. I am just so happy. Its a good feeling.
2 comments:
sounds like heaven to me.... brownies and a crackling fire and a baby soon to be. lovely! Love to you and the bean, as always, Auntie De
I've seen that smiling, content face while you were sitting at a traffic light and I must admit, I thought I was intruding on a very private moment even though the whole world could have seen you. You had the biggest smile on your face and I can only imagine what you were thinking about but my guess was Baby Boy Bean. I pointed out to Terry how peaceful you looked and we both just smiled.
MET
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