Wyatt One Liners - Bedtime

I try to talk to Wyatt each night about our "High's and Low's"; the high point of our day and the lowest part.  I have also heard it called the rose, the thorn and the bud (something new or exciting).  Maybe we will call it that when he gets older.  This has produced some very interesting night time stories.  Most of the time his high's are something that just happened like "I got to play horsey with Pa" or "I got to play at Charlie's house."  And his low's are the one moment I don't want him to remember like "When you yelled at me to hurry up" or "when you made me go to bed."  The nights I love the most are the ones that he has no lows and 2 highs.  Or no lows and all highs.  "The day was so many highs I can't remember them all!"  Sometimes he says he can't remember anything and asks me to recount them.  "Mom, talk about your highs and lows."  Then we role play.
"Hey bud, remember when I got mad because I asked you to eat your dinner and you kept on running to get more toys?"
"Yeah"
"That was my low.  I don't like getting frustrated.  Ok, you be mom and I'll be Wyatt. Ok?"
"Ok"
"Momma, I know I haven't eaten any dinner but I want to play with toys." I say
"Wyatt, sit down and eat some dinner."
"But I want to get my toys."
"Dinner makes you stronger.  It's important!" says Wyatt
"Ok, mom. How about I take 3 bites and then I go get toys!"
"3 bites is a lot!  That sounds like a good plan!"
And then there are some nights where as soon as I turn off the light Wyatt says yawning "I'm asleep already."

Every night, I put Wyatt to bed in his room.  We read books.  I wait for him to fall asleep then sneak downstairs.  Most of the time he calls for me around 2am and then he comes to find me in my room.  I know he shouldn't sleep with me, but I also know it is fleeting.  Most of the time it doesn't bother me.  Sometimes when I'm especially tired or he is sick or Auntie B is home we have "sleepovers" where I put him to bed in my room initial.  At this point, after almost 4 years, I actually sleep better with him in my bed. 

"Wyatt, you're not always going to want to sleep with your mom.  Big boys don't always need to sleep with their moms.  Firemen don't sleep with their moms at the firehouse."

"Yes, Mom, they do.  Their mom's do come with them to the firehouse."

"Really?"

"Yes. That is why they have bunk beds. I will sleep on the top and you can sleep on the bottom. Then we can be fireman together.  They have firegirl's too."

I usually wake up to hear his little footsteps right outside my door (or most of the time, I am not even asleep at all) and the door knob twisting.  I have been trying to break him of this habit but I haven't really had a lot of motivation. The other night he comes down and stops at the edge of my bed rather then his usual of just hopping right in.
"Helwo"
"Hey bud."
"Momma, I love you." In his little sign song voice that he uses when he is trying to get something.
"I love you too.  Come on up."
Works every time.

One night, I had fallen asleep with a candle lit in my room.  (This doesn't usually happen, but hey, I was tired.)  Wyatt comes down, spies the candle and shouts "What is this?  A blackout or somethsing?" Then he leaves the room, goes into the kitchen and turns on the lights to check if they work and comes back in.  I blow out the candle and marched him back upstairs.  Then next morning he asks "Mom, was there a blackout last night or was it just a dream?"

Just a Boy in his Dirt Pile

The Soccer Star

50 Months

Bud,

Bri and Elias had their baby on March 31st and I got to hold little Michael at the hospital.  It was weird, how after 4 years, some things remain lodged in my head and how others just evaporated.  Like how instantly your newborn smell came rushing back.  Or the way you used to snuggle your head into me and the way you liked to be held.  But yet when Bri asked me normal questions, like when did I give you a bottle, I was at a total loss.  I find myself wondering how we got from baby to 4 a lot.  Where did all that time go?  Sometimes as a parent (as you will hopefully one day see) there seems to be a lot of "hurry up and wait."  I find that there are so many chores and things to do that the day is over before I feel it even started.  And conversely there are times when there seems to be large expanses of time that I need to fill.  Wasn't it yesterday that I brought you home from the hospital?  But haven't you been in my life forever?  How are you 4?  And it seems like ages ago you were a baby?  We are going everyday.  Every moment is filled something but how come I feel that we are in the same place we were 4 years ago?  Its weird.

Because you are such a big boy now you started soccer.  First practice went less then fabulous.  We were late (my fault) and rushing always puts you a little on edge.  All the other kids were on the field, and right off the Irish coach thought your name was Ryan.  So he keeps calling you Ryan and you keep on correcting him.  Finally, this got you upset and you ran to me crying "Mom, he's not understanding my name!  Please, tell him my name!"  After that was cleared up, you missed the rest of the directions and then felt lost.  "Mom, I'm no good at this."  Then went off to play with your friend Charlie.  I shrugged and decided you needed some time to get used to it.  I will forever be traumatized when my soccer coach yelled at me for kicking the ball with my toe when I was 5.  I vowed that that would not happen to you.

Well, we worked at home.  Talked it up.  Kicked the ball around a bit.  And on game day, you were brilliant.  I am not quite sure you will be the next David Beckham but you definitely have great enthusiasm.  You listened to the coach, hell, I think you gave him some directions.  You played great with the other kids, taking turns seamlessly.  You ran up and down that field with all your might.  You liked to play goalie but unfortunately there are no goalies in your age bracket.  Every time some one would yell "Towards the goal" you would go regardless of where the ball was.  I am so proud that you tried your very best.  It was a really great day.  And those damn cleats are the cutest thing I have ever seen.  I think I took about 100 pictures just of those cleats.

I had quite a scare with you the other day.  We were down at the beach with the dogs and Gianna.  You and Gianna were standing on a rock taking our normal stroll (down the steps, around the beach, up the hill, into the backyard, the whole thing takes 5 minutes tops but we usually dawdle) when Cash came face to face with a neighbors dog.  They starting going at it.  Literally, bitting each others coats, growling, snarling, and yelping.  I got them separated, but afraid it might happen again or worse that one of you would be caught in the middle, I told you to turn around and come back the other way.  I was pre-occuped with the dogs, heard some rustling behind me, to which I assumed was you and Gianna.  When I looked back, Gianna was standing next to me and you were gone.  I called and there was no answer.  I freaked.  I sent Gianna in one direction, me in the other and I am scanning the water telling myself that I never heard a splash.  Honestly, it was about 3 minutes when you finally answered one of my increasingly shrill calls.  You had gone up the hill and then repeated the loop to the top of the stairs.  It was a classic parent moment where I didn't know if I wanted to scream at you or hug you.  I did hug you.  But I also put you in time out.  You wanted to go up the hill.  You didn't answer my calls because your "listening ears weren't working because there were too many bumble bee's buzzing."  Then you tried to get out of your time out by singing me a song. "Know why?" you ask.  (Which is your phrase.  It comes after everything you say.) "Because you think my singing voice is so beautiful and it will make you happy."  So, I made you sing me a song, while in time out.  It is hard to punish a kid that you are just so gosh darn happy to see.

Wyatt, I love you.  Every minute, I love you.  But if you ever pull a stunt like that again, I am going to send every single one of your toys to Africa.  "Know why?"  Because in that 3 minutes you scared the everliving shit out of me.  It was like watching the entire world explode before my eyes.  Got it?

I love you, everyday.
Momma

My Goose

Wild By Nature

Conferencing

Terry and I had Wyatt's first parent teacher conference the other day.  I wasn't nervous.  Just apprehensive, I guess.  I know Wyatt is very smart.  His vocabulary is amazing and he makes quick connections.  I know he is a good kid.  They have told me about one incident when he got angry and pushed a little girl on the playground.  They said he admitted to it immediately and then was crying and so upset about it that they felt bad punishing him.  He was punishing himself far worse then their time out would.  I know he flaps his arms, jumps and rubs his hands when he gets excited but only when he gets excited.  It is like his excitement cannot be contained and spills out through his entire body. I know he can't pronounce certain words.  But others like carburetor, amphibious, frustrated or sea anemone, he can say perfectly and in context.  I know he sometimes has trouble concentrating on things he doesn't want to do.  He can sit for hours, explicitly following Lego directions, but has trouble sitting still while eating dinner for 5 minutes.

I know all of these things about my son but my worst fear was they were going to tell me something I didn't know.  Something that I wasn't aware of.  Something that I didn't know to look for or be concerned about.  His inability to pronounce L's is endearing, not concerning.  His attention span is classic 4 year old boy, nothing to worry about.  His flapping makes me want to hug the child till he pukes, not an early sign of something bigger.  His excitement around other kids is because he is an only child, not because he is anti-social.

I love Wyatt's teachers.  I respect them.  They are with Wyatt 9 hours a week.  I value their opinion.  I appreciate that they have more experience with younger kids then I do.  But it is also hard to hear someone else talk about your kid.

Most of what they said was positive.  No surprises.  They did mention a few things that I was concerned about myself.  They think his L's will mature with time.  And his stammer, when he is trying to find the right word, is from excitement and nothing more.  He could use with some more interaction with other kids, but I know that.  Hence the two story-times, soccer, YMCA class, and of course the East Ave summer camp that will be starting shortly. We will keep working on his letters and numbers, his penmanship, his concentration.  But they were quick to remind me that even as adults things that interest us hold our attention for longer.  Basically, they confirmed what I already knew; that Wyatt is a pretty amazing kid and I couldn't be prouder.

So Long Winter...

49 Months

Goose,

The dust has settled from your birthday.  Just barely. You are still talking about presents you want for your birthday.  Child, you got enough.  Trust me.  And, Thank God, you finally are including 4 in your counting!

A Wyatt Original

We took a lovely mini-vacation to visit Mia and Kelly (and significant others) in Boston.  It was just nice to get out of the state for a while.  Pretend we were somewhere warm.  We went for a hike in the woods and you brought your camera.  Honestly, some of the pictures came out pretty damn good.  You might have an eye already.  It is just too bad that the picture quality isn't too great.  I might even frame some.  I'm not even sure if you meant to do it, capture the texture of the leaves or a ray of light, but you did.  On our way home we stopped at the Boston Aquarium.  You have been watching this new show on Disney called the Octonauts.  You're obsessed and have a new found interest in marine life.  I swear, you were running around the aquarium telling me which blob of colorfulness was which.  "Look Mom!  Its an anemone!  Its a comb jellyfish!  Its a sea cucumber!"  Or directing where we should go next.  "Mom, where are the pilot fish?" Most of the time I had no idea what you were talking about.  I had to keep checking the map.  You ran through that place.

I was determined to get you on skis this winter. Unfortunately, we have had one day of snow compared to last years 50 million.  So, I figured Boston was about as far north as we were going to get.  I found this little mountain about 30 mins from Mia's house.  I got you all geared up and you lasted 2 runs.  I decided to just stick with you in my boots in case you needed an extra hand.  I got you sliding your feet and then we went up the bunny hill.  You did it once holding onto me for dear life and the second run you let go a little.  When you did you started yelling, "Mom!  I'm skiing!!  Look, I'm skiing!"  Before reaching to grab a hold of me again.  After that, you asked for some hot chocolate.  It was very cute and I wasn't going to push it on your first time.  Hopefully, next year we will have more opportunities.

You finally had another audition.  We were on a little drought there for a while.  I wouldn't mention it but you said the darnest thing right afterward.  Aunt Wiz was trying to explain to you what you were suppose to do when they called your name.  In some vague way she offered, you have to do what they say and then they will give you money to buy lots of toys.  Yes.  That is what she told you.  So, you go in and look perfect and adorable.  When it was over you marched straight to Aunt Wizzie and say "I did everything they told me to do.  Are they going to give me money now?"  Ehh, no.  Not quite yet.  All the parents around us started laughing and we rushed to get you out of there before you said something else.

You have perfected this uncanny ability to know just when I am going to loose it.  When you are so close to pushing my last button and earning yourself a time out. When you have asked to too many times for water at bedtime.  When I am about to loose my patience.  Just before that happens you run to me, throw your arms around any part of me that you can reach and say "I love you, Mom."  I don't know how you have figured it out but you have.  Of course I am a sucker for your I love yous.  It might not get you out of a time out but it will certainly buy you some more time.  I might not have figured you out but you definitely have figured me out.

I love you everyday,
Momma

Expectations

This is the second rainbow I saw in 2012.  Caught just two weeks after seeing the first one.  I was driving home from a night in Long Beach and this was arched across the sky. Dipping into the water at either end. I don't think I have ever seen a rainbow in its entirety before.  I called home, told Mom to put Wyatt's shoes on and grab the camera.  We raced back to the beach. You couldn't see the whole thing anymore but still both ends, with some clouds in the middle.

I have had this crazy hunch that 2012 is going to be a really good year.  Every year I start with good intentions and hope but, for some reason, this year feels different.  I have this nagging feeling that something amazing is coming down the road but I am not really sure how to get there or even what it is.  However cheesy it sounds, these dual rainbows appearing at the very beginning of the year, seem to be some kind of sign.  A confirmation that this gut feeling is going to manifest itself.

I am hesitant to even talk about it.  As if somehow speaking of having lofty expectations for 2012 will make them disappear.  I don't even know what I am expecting.  Maybe just more good then bad?  Maybe it is just a better attitude?  Maybe the hope of a good year will be enough to make it so? 

Fingers crossed.

The Woodsman

The Par-Tay!

I rented out the YMCA for Wyatt's big party.  He was so excited about it.  He pretty much invited every kid he came in contact with. Someone at the library, another boy at Home Depot.  At one point he said that no girls were allowed to come but, thankfully, changed his mind.  He wanted a Lego Party. However, I was confidant that not all his friends were as proficient as he is.  So I betted on something everyone could enjoy - the gym a the Y then really hammed it up in the party room and favor boxes.  I think pictures will tell it better.

Wyatt's Lego cake.  I probably could have make it better working with fondant.  But fondant terrifies me.  And since I didn't start on the cake until Friday night, 2 beers in, I decided not to mess with anything new. When Wyatt saw it he exclaimed "Mom!  You're amazing!"  Best. Reaction. Ever.

 The table for the kids in the party room.  Complete with Happy Birthday spelled with Lego Duplo bricks on the mantle.  Not sure if you can really see it, but Wyatt and I wrapped the juice boxes to look like bricks too.  Mom made this Ah-Maze-Ing Lego Minifigure cut out box.  She attempted to take all the kids pictures in the box for the thank you cards.  Some kids were into it, other could care less.  

Wyatt, obviously, thought it was awesome.  So worth it.

This was the cake table.  I also made these chocolate covered marshmallow Lego head pops.  They were super easy and I had a ton of fun making the faces.  There are a lot with varying degrees of facial hair, Harry Potter, handle bar mustaches, and of course one with a Mike Tyson facial tattoo.  We made them for his class on Wednesday too.  Everyone was duly impressed. The boxes in the background are the favor boxes that Wyatt decorated with his Lego stickers. 

Wyatt was really into this.  We spent a good amount of time taking old broken crayons and melting them then pouring them into a Minifigure ice cube tray.  We made a ton of colors and each kid got a set of 5 in their favor boxes. Plus, it was a good activity for Wy and I.  We had some really good chats while unwrapping crayons. I also made a mini coloring book to go with them.  I was mildly nervous that some kid was going to think they were chocolate. 

The staff at the Y were totally amazing.  They kept the kids active and engaged for the whole hour, pulling out new stuff, organizing races, twisting Wyatt up in the parachute.  It was all really cute and was so worth it being able to watch him enjoying his day rather then trying to organize everything. Becca dressed Wy in this totally adorable outfit.  Once Wyatt got running, it was all over.  He kept running up to me saying "I'm sweaty." Then taking off another layer of clothing.  I finally had to tell him there was nothing left to take off.

 Everyone had a great time.  Especially Wyatt.  When it was time for cake, he ran into the other room then immediately asked to go back into the gym.  Kid loves his cake so that is definitely saying something.

I love this picture for 800 reasons.  First, the girl (Sophia) on the left!  Oh my God she is astonished.  Because it took Wyatt astonishingly long to blow out those 5 little candles.  And he got astonishingly close to burning off all his eyebrows.  Don't you want to go there?  Just live your entire life in this photo?

I am so happy that I had the opportunity to make him this happy. Happy Birthday, my love.

4 Years - 48 Months

My love,

When you woke up yesterday, you sat straight up in bed and starting yelling. "I'm 3! I'm 3! I'm 3? Mom, am I still 3?" I kept having to remind you that, yes, indeed you were still 3 but tomorrow you would be 4.  Then Auntie B was joking with you, asking you how old you were going to be, you kept answering 6. I partial think your number confusion is because you always forget 4.  You can count to 15 but will consistently skip 4.  1-2-3-5-6.  Like it doesn't exist.  I have worked on it with you for days, weeks, months even.  Still no 4.  I am hoping now that you ARE 4 it will magically come into existence.  I guess now we have a whole year to work on it.

We took a trip into the city the other day. It was an early birthday lunch and lego's date.  I usually drive in with you but this time I decided to take the train.  At every stop you would ask "Where are we now? Can we drive here?  Have I been to this town before?" The rest of the train was getting quite a kick out of you. You were just so curious. You were a little confused about how some trains we took were double deckers and others were "single deckers" and others were subways.  I was trying to explain the difference but, truth be told, I have no idea what makes them different.  We spent an indecent amount of time in the Lego store in Rockefeller Centre. Then walked to a restaurant and spent hours assembling some of the Lego's we bought. You actually want to complete them yourself now but don't really know how to read the "menu's" yet. So, I pick the pieces out for you, tell you where to put them, then have to watch patiently while you assemble.  I have to admit, it's hard not to jump in a take over.  You never get frustrated with pieces you can't quite put right and you rarely ask for help.  Most of the time, you have more patience then me.  After lunch, we took a nice 10 block walk to which you said "There is a lot of walking in this big city." You did great.  It was a first time I went in with just you and my bag.  It was liberating.

So much of our days are clouded with other things that need to get done.  Even when I am trying to just focus on sitting and playing with you, I am still petting the dogs.  Or anxious to get some laundry in.  Or figure out what's for dinner.  Or dragging you on errands.  Or jumping to answer the phone. You have story-time on Mondays.  So, we usually have pizza after school to get to the library on time.  I love that time with you but even then I am rushing you to eat so we won't be late.  There is always something else that needs to happen.  On our day in the city, I let all my errands, to-do-lists, and responsibilities fade.  Solely focused on you.  Your Legos.  And holding your hand when walking down the street. It was a good day. A really good day.

Now that you are older and definitely more independent, I have been finding myself daydreaming about what my life would have been like without you.  Where would I be living?  What state?  What country?  What would I be doing?  Who would I be living with?  What would I be like?  They seem to float in the back of my brain, haunting me at lonely moments.  I feel tremendous guilt about finding these questions in my head.  However, after allowing myself to dream for a little, I always come back to; no matter where I would be, whom I was with, or what I was doing I don't think I would have ever been as happy or fulfilled or grounded or passionate as I am right now.  Yes, I am sure my life would be exciting and happy as it always was.  But when I think of my life before you, in hindsight, it seems like I was lost.  Like there was something (or someone) missing.  Like I was waiting for my real life to begin.  My conclusion is I think it is ok to daydream every once and a while.  But Wyatt you have to understand, no matter what I missed out on, I would pick you every time.  I choose you.  I will always choose you.  I don't regret one minute I have gotten to spend with you. There is not one thing I would change.

I am sure at some point in your life, you will also begin to question: what have I done with my life?  Or where could it have gone if I made different choices?  Or what am I doing now?  Or what does my life really mean?  It might not seem like a great feat to be a good son.  But to me.  To me, you have been a miracle. You have given me the greatest gift and I am forever yours for it. You are the arrow that shoots right to the heart of me.  I love you with every fiber of who I am and with everything I have.  I am so blessed and grateful and joyous that you are in my life.  You are the best thing about me.  The other day you told me, "Mom, you make me feel like me."  Well, my love, you make me feel more like me too.

I love you Birthday Boy. Now and forever.
Momma

Protect and Serve

Wyatt One Liners

I was finishing up Wyatt's bath and mentioned that I was going out.
"You're going out to dinner?"
"Yes. I am late. So, lets hurry up."
"Am I coming?"
"Not this time bud."  I was expecting for him to be a little upset, instead he starts smiling.
"Thank you! Thank you!"
"Thank you?"
"There are no rules with Gammy and Pa!"
"No rules, huh." I asked Gammy about this once we got out and she promptly shushed Wyatt and told him that he was getting her in trouble.

Gammy was trying to get Wyatt ready in the morning.  (He is a BEAR in the morning.  It is a constant battle trying to get ready by 8:45).
"Wyatt, what do you think you want to wear today?"
"My sexy green shirt." And runs out of the room to get get it.  Gammy and I just look at each other. Where that came from, I still don't know.

I was cleaning with some music on.  Wyatt runs into me asking "Mom? What's this windy song?  It sounds like Dada." I promptly text Terry and ask him if he listened to the song with Wyatt in the car.  Terry had never heard of it before. It was Winter Winds by Mumford & Sons.  Weird, right?

Wyatt had an audition/interview in the city.  The last one he went on didn't go so well. They asked him to go in by himself and he didn't want to.  Of course, I didn't push him.  Well, this time I had told him what was going on and he thought it would be "ok".  He was great. Walks right in and when I got to him, he was Mr. Chatty schmoozing all the lady assistants.  After we left I asked him what happened and told him how proud I was of him. He goes "I brought my manners this time. Last time I left them at home."

We were crossing the parking lot at the grocery store and he didn't want to hold my hand.  I kept grabbing down at him; telling him he needed to be careful and that I didn't want him to get hurt.
"Wyatt, I would be very upset if something happened to you."
"If I got rund over, you can grow a new Wyatt."
"Bud, I could never grow another you! You are the only person that is exactly you."
"But you can grow me a brother."
"Not right this second. But eventually. Hopefully someday."

Wyatt just finished using the toliet.  "Hey, bud. Maybe it is time to learn how to wipe your own butt. Let me teach you.  You're a big boy now." After the tutoring was finished, (which was really weird.  Like really weird.) Wyatt goes "Now I know!  I can wipe your butt next time!"  Ummmm, no.

Wyatt and I are always striking deals.  If you eat one more bite you, can play for another 3 minutes.  Brush your teeth, then you can watch a little show.  Eat lunch, then you can have some chocolate.  I guess I always preface the ultimatum with "So here's the deal."  Wyatt eventually caught on.  Now, when I tell him a deal that he doesn't like so much he responds with "Well, that's not MY deal."