I am pretty open about my uneducated ways of mothering. I don't really know what I am doing so I do what feels right to me. I think that is the best advice I can give new parents. Trust your instincts. It's your child, do what is right by them and what feels comfortable for you. Older moms or moms with several kids are generally pretty open about offering good advice or reminiscing about younger days with younger children. New moms tend to be nit-picky. Making snide comments like "oh, he's not rolling over yet?" or "it is a little hot for that outfit isn't it?" or "I would never work full time" or "you're feeding him solids already?" or "but I'm breastfeeding." automatically assuming I'm not. It makes me question myself sometimes. I'm not perfect but I highly doubt anyone is.I know I am doing a good job but because everything is so new all the time it is hard to be confident 24/7. I wish my friends would start having kids so I wouldn't have to wear armor. So, I could confide in someone else who is going through the same thing. So, I wouldn't feel stupid about confessing I don't know a lot. That is the worse thing you can do. Confess you don't know what you are doing. Then the entire mom brigade charges into your home, yells at you for being inadequate, and steals your baby. Seriously, that is what it feels like. God forbid I admit I am new to babies. I am going to start putting the pressure on my newlywed friends. I need some mom friends who aren't going to get grossed out when I talk about my boobs.
5 comments:
Jeez... I hope I dont do that to you! I think you're doing great. I didn't know what I was doing either, Michael was my guinea pig! I would just like to say keep doing what you feel is right and _____ what anybody else says.... it's usually from envy anyway. Love to you and the "perfect" Bean. love, auntie de
OK, crazy lady and I mean that lovingly. Look to the right on your blog and see all the pictures of that happy and healthy baby boy. Being the old mom, I use to tell new moms that there wasn't a college for raising children. It's that unconditionally love you have for your child that makes you the best mom. Kate, you are one super duper mom. Boy, did I make mistakes with my huckleberries but they've done alright. Anyone that asks me about Wyatt always gets the same answer - he's great and Kate is such a great mom. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
Love
~~MET~~
AHHHH, I guess Bill and I ought to hide if you're gonna be putting pressure on ur newly married friends to have babies haha.. It will be a lil' while but we'll catch up at some point.
As for those snide mothers w/ think their poopie diapers don't stink... screw em. Every time you feel put down, look at ur beautiful little man and remember that for u its all about him and he's lookin perty perfect. So that means you're doing a stellar job and its not your fault these woman have no self worth other than what month their dumb baby rolls over. haha..
hugs,
Juliet Bowen
My Sweet Kate,
All you need do is gaze into the eyes of our little bean to know your doing a great job. Don't let other moms send any doubt your way because you are indeed a dedicated, loving and fun mom. But in fact you are right about the mean mom club, some can be quite judgemental and feel that their way is the only way but thats when you have to send them on the highway! Engage your mean mom force field and let your instincts guide you because from what I can see they are good solid insticts filled with love and pure dedication to the well being of your little man Wyatt.
hi. i still feel that way! and ryan will be 4 in july!! LOL. but i definitely felt the same way u did. i was always afraid someone was going to come in & say u do that!!!? or no no no it should be done this way! u learn as u go & by the looks of things u are doing a wonderful job. and of course all babies are different so u do what makes wyatt happy, and u happy too.
i always thought when alot of experienced moms saw me pregnant they would feel the urge to tell me how horrible the labor was. and i would just nod & uh-huh them to death. like they felt they almost wanted to scare me, because of all the experienced moms did the same to them when they were expecting.
i try really hard to talk about the great times, and remember the funny things that happened during delivery or when ryan first came home etc with new moms. but with alot of woman it is like a competition, and i am by far that way. so i guess i will never fit in! LOL
take care of yourself & take care of wyatt...
xoxoxo
cousin jennifer
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