Zzzzzz

I can't sleep.  No, stratch that.  I don't think I will ever sleep again.  Ever.  I don't have trouble falling asleep, its the staying asleep that gets me.  Its 3am.  We had a busy day.  I should be asleep, but alas, I'm not.  I fell asleep putting Wyatt to bed (which how could I not?  He's so cuddly and soothing and sleepy...drool) only to wake up for NO APPARENT reason.  Then not being able to fall back asleep, I give in and head into the artificial light of the night.  I think it is safe to say that I haven't had a full 8 hours of sleep since I was pregnant.  Thats about 3 years ago.  I have always been a light sleeper but this is ridiculous.

All I can think of is that it is just so flipping ironic.  Wyatt is FINALLY sleeping through the night.  From 9:30pm till 8am.  And I am STILL getting up.  Is there no justice in the world?!?!  Sometimes I lay awake watching him sleep.  He's so angelic and peaceful.  Then I slowly get jealous. Sometimes I contemplate waking him up just so I won't be lonley.  That idea is quickly stratched.  I really don't think there is anything worse then being awake when all you want to do is be asleep.

Medication has been suggested. But how could I possible take sleeping pills?  Yes, I guess that would work for me but is that really the best choice for Wyatt.  What if he needs me during the night and I can't wake up?  I can't be drowsy during the day.  Plus, I am pretty hesitant to take medication anyway.  So, no.  Pills are not my solution.

I know my naysayers are saying "Move that child into another bed."  Wyatt is not the problem.  Yes, he rolls around a little but nothing dramatic.  I have been (mildly) trying to get him in his own bed.  I thought that Rebecca could put him to sleep upstairs in his potential new room under the guise of a fun sleepover with his aunt.  It lasted 30 minutes before he told Auntie B that the sleepover was over and he wanted to go back downstairs. So much for my well laid plans.  I'm not really motivated to move him.  He is starting school soon. I am hesitant to throw too many new things at him at once.  And (am I allowed to admit this) I am going to be sad to see him go.  I will never have this time with him again.  And I am not sure, if I have another child, that co-sleeping will be an option under different circumstances.  I enjoy having him close to me.  He is a cuddlier and I am more than happy to oblige.  He is my baby and I will always be there if he needs me.

I guess I am just going to have to tough it out and pray for some relief soon.  Catch up on my DVR and Netflix.  Maybe join Wyatt for his hour long naps.  Invest in some delicious, irresistible coffee.  Relish in the quiet at 4am.  Moonlight as a phone sex operator.  Who knows?