Insert Therapy Joke Here

In an effort to better myself for 2009, I have decided to go back to my therapist.  After working so hard to call it off last time it was a big decision for me.  But I distinctly feel that there are some things that I should work on with a professional.  Things that I just can't seem to wrap my head around and things that I would like to bounce off someone that is detached from the situation.  I would like to believe this is the mature thing to do rather then feeling like I am running back to her with my tail between my legs.

I hesitate to mention this but deep breath and leap, right?  Drum roll please....I am kind of dating someone.  He is an ex-boyfriend that I dated for about a year.  Eric knew about my pregnancy, keeping in touch throughout, and came to see Wyatt for the first time when he was about 4 months.  We have been getting slightly more serious but I really, really, really have no idea how to do this.  Successfully managing dating and motherhood is my first topic to cover in therapy.  Talk about a big agenda.  I have been having a hard time committing and can't understand why.  Eric is great and Wyatt adores him.  What is my issue?! 

Next on my list is how to better communicate with Terry and his parents.  I feel very lost in how to define our relationship.  I am also extremely hesitant to speak up because I am afraid that hurt feelings might tarnish our life long partnership.  It is something I really need to get over.  It is a really strange relationship for all of us and seems to be getting more and more complicated.  And I can foresee it getting more complicated in the future.  Now, I know that therapy will not "solve" all these nagging questions but at least I will feel more confident to cope with them.

This blog is very cathartic for me and does help a great deal in enabling me to flush out my thoughts.  However, despite my extrovert nature, there are somethings that I would rather not discuss in a public forum hence where the therapist comes in.  Sorry, Internet.  All the gory, messy details will come out in a tell-all book that I am thinking about writing.  I am sure there will be interesting posts to come as the issues come to fruition.  Here's to a step in the right direction to start off 2009.